1.60 Ever-Growing Collection

Disclaimer: Swearing.

Micah found Morgyn helping themselves to a large glass of liquor from the bar.

“I wasn’t sure you’d be back.” The sage said over their shoulder.

“Drowning your sorrows, are you?” Micah asked dryly.

Morgyn closed the lid on the globe bar, turning around. “I’m celebrating, actually.” They avoided Micah’s gaze, their eyes on the glass instead.

“Celebrating?” Micah arched an eyebrow. The look on Morgyn’s face did not look remotely joyful.

“Yes. You should too – I’d offer you a drink, but clearly we never agree on your beverage of choice, so…” Morgyn added with a smirk. “Regardless, you’re going to be a father. Cordelia’s pregnant.”

Micah closed his eyes, willing everything to fade away for a moment. This wasn’t real. Oddly, a part of him almost wished he was back with Verena’s coven, as much as he’d hated that hollow existence.

“How?” He asked finally. A father. Him. What a joke…

“Well, when a man and a woman love each other very much…”

“I’m really not in the mood for this crap.” He interrupted Morgyn. It was like the sage was going out of their way to irritate him.

“I’m not sure what you want me to say. I must have missed the vampire biology class. I never did finish traditional school, after all.” Morgyn shrugged.

“I went to the old mischief sage.” Micah ignored their statement completely. “And according to her, it’s impossible to break the damn love spell. Apparently the options are dying, or dying inside. Doesn’t quite sound like what you said. Matter of willpower, you said.”

“Ah. Regrettably I never had a formal confirmation that dying was really a requirement. You know these mischief sages, never quite giving you the full story…” The sage replied. “So, is Haruka speaking from experience? Is she citing a tome? What does dying inside even entail, exactly?”

“You tell me – you seem to have experience in that department.” The vampire retorted.

“Listen to yourself. All these proclamations, it’s all very melodramatic. You’re focusing on the wrong things.” Morgyn’s tone was driving Micah mad. “So you can’t break the spell. Cordelia is the mother of your child. Is being in love with her really so bad?”

“No, it’s fucking great being in love with two people at the same time.” He snapped.

A sudden silence filled the room. The smug look vanished from Morgyn’s face.

“Two people?” They repeated softly. “Are you saying you love me, Micah?”

“That’s… not what I meant to say.” Micah tried to compose himself. It seemed he just went from mistake to mistake these days. “Whatever. One for your ever-growing collection. Congratulations.”

“Let me get this straight. You think I collect people, and that I’m dead inside, and yet somehow, you also believe that you love me?” Morgyn said. “I’ve got to hand it to you, nobody marinades themselves in self-punishment quite the way you do.”

“Right, because you think changing feelings is just a question of snapping your fingers. Willpower.” Micah hissed. “I guess you wouldn’t know though. Do you even really care about anyone at all?”

Morgyn stepped closer to him, their hand tracing his face gently.

“Micah… I’m not sure if I’m still capable of loving anyone. But if I am, it would be you. It would always be you.”

Micah was the first to let go. He wasn’t sure what he made of any of this. But maybe it didn’t really matter. Morgyn was right – he was focusing on the wrong things. No matter how he felt about it, how insane it was, he was going to have a child. That had to be the priority now.

He cleared his throat. “I have to go to her. Be there for the baby. For both of them.”

Morgyn nodded. “I understand.”

For once, the sage seemed to have nothing more to say.

***

Standing at the front porch made Micah oddly nervous. He scolded himself for how silly that was – he used to live here, this was no different from the countless nights he’d returned home back then. But of course, is was.

Before he could change his mind, Cordelia spotted him through the glass door and stood up from the couch to let him in.

“Micah? I’m so glad you’re ok! When Morgyn said you weren’t in the magic realm and that you’ve gone off somewhere, I… well, all the spellcasters and their… I was worried.”

Her words and the look on her face made all kinds of unpleasant memories resurface. She’d never reminded him of Carys more than in that moment. And that was before she flung herself into his arms.

But he’d changed a lot since that fateful night with Carys. Definitely been a hell of a lot closer to Cordelia than a short hug…

Only now did it occur to him that if he was able to resist the lure of blood in such a primal moment, he could probably suppress the thirst in any situation. Seemed unimaginable that he’d be able to get to this level of restraint from where he was a year ago, when he first met her…

But all of that seemed like a lifetime ago. And his memories of Carys, beyond the final one, were from another lifetime. Maybe it could be ok to try to leave them there, at least for now… He pulled Cordelia closer.

“It’s all ok,” he whispered in her ear. “Everything’s going to be ok.”

She tensed up against him, pulling away slightly.

Of course she did. What was he thinking? No sane human could find the embrace of a vampire reassuring by any stretch of the imagination. What had happened between them was a direct result of that spell, nothing more. She had to know better now, even with the remnants of the spell still affecting them.

Except the spell would never stop affecting them, would it? Both Morgyn and Haruka had confirmed as much. There was no way in hell he’d let Cordelia die, or die inside, whatever that meant… but then they were stuck with the spell. Micah couldn’t quite let himself break the news to her. And then there was that niggling voice at the back of his mind, questioning whether his feelings were really a product of the spell at all… he had to focus.

He cleared his throat. “I’ve heard. About the baby.”

“I’m sorry.” She said quietly. “I didn’t think…”

“Shh. I should be the one apologising. I should have done the thinking.” He corrected her. Though perhaps he’d thought too much. Or he’d thought about the wrong things. In any case, it hardly mattered now.

Cordelia looked up at him. “I don’t know what to do about the baby wanting blood, Micah.”

His whole body froze. “What?”

“Morgyn didn’t tell you?” She seemed even less sure of herself now.

“Tell me what?”

“I’ve been craving blood. Haven’t really been able to eat much apart aside from Dandy’s plasma fruit. You should have told me about that, by the way. I- anyway… Morgyn thinks the baby is some kind of a hybrid.”

That was a lot of information to process. Earlier today, he hadn’t even entertained an idea of a child at all, let alone… Some kind of hybrid. That sounded like his worst nightmare.

Micah forced himself to backtrack, reminding himself the reason he came here in the first place. His own feelings about any of this mess were irrelevant. He was here for her.  

“We’ll figure it out.” He said, lightly squeezing her hand. He hoped he sounded at least a little bit convincing.

She let go of his hand almost immediately. “But there is no we, is there?”

“Obviously. Well, not like that, anyway.” He could almost taste the bitterness of the words as they left his mouth. But she was right. They’d agreed on that already, didn’t they? It was for the best.

Even if they never found a way to break the damn spell, at least if she stayed conscious of how artificial those feelings were, perhaps she could set them aside one day, Micah figured.

“Not like that. Exactly.” She repeated flatly, taking her hand off his chest.

“That doesn’t mean you should have to do all of this alone, though.” He interjected. “Which is why I came here, actually.”

“What do you mean?”

“I want to help. With whatever you need. Whatever the baby needs.” Micah added. Especially if the child was really going to be craving blood, he’d need to teach them… well, whatever he could teach them. If he knew anything worth teaching at all, he thought grimly.

“Anyway, if you’re ok with it, I was hoping to move back in? I mean, we’ve lived together before. We’d just be… housemates, again. I understand if you don’t want me living here, of course. I just… want to be there, for both of you.” He stumbled over his words. It wasn’t like him. But apparently, he managed to lose the ability of coherent speech around her now.

“What about Morgyn?” She asked quietly.

Micah sighed. He wasn’t even sure what exactly she was asking about. Morgyn’s involvement with the child? Or his own relationship with the sage; whatever him and Morgyn were going to be now, if anything? He had no answer on either front.

“I don’t know.” He admitted.